I make assumptions about what I can and can't do based on stereotypical images in my head.
I'm no expert here, but I think we all do this right?
Our ego loves a definite proposition and stereotypes and pigeonholing can be very appealing, even necessary sometimes.
Except when it stops us from moving forward.
We hold our stereotypes up to the light, mount them on a pedestal and bow down to their stories of suffering and mishap.
It's amazing how a good story can have a greater allure than following your heart even when that story is holding you back.
My regulars at the moment are romantic images of total self-sufficiency in the 70s (a la 'The Good Life') and the stereotype of the warm motherly figure baking bread and homeschooling her children 24/7. Lovely stories and images that feed my ego but I somehow always fall short of.
How do I know these are constructs of my ego and not my soul gold?
Firstly, they're extreme. I hear myself saying things like 'I'm doing x so I should be doing y aswell' or 'I can't have that AND that - they don't go together'.
I also know because, when I slow down enough, I can feel myself pulled off centre. Trying to be something other than myself.
And that's not cool.
So what do I do?
Firstly, I gently remind myself that I don't need to throw the baby out with the bath water (a favourite saying in my family). In other words, there's still merit in the images in my head, they just need some adjusting.
Then, when all is calm again, I (gently) visualise myself unhooking the parts of said stereotype. I take my image of total self-sufficiency (for example) and see that it's made up of lots of actionable parts and I imagine unhooking them from one another, so that I may more easily choose the parts that feel right for me, and be okay with letting the other parts go.
Then I feel ease return, and I can step forward once again with a real picture of myself.
Which stereotypes/images in the media/identities are you commonly drawn to? Are you hooked up with them?
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