Indecision

What to write? This seems to be a time of year for indecision. For some reason (which I could analyse further but this Mama needs a break from that) I'm having trouble making big decisions at the moment. Sometimes the way forwards is clear and I feel brave and able to take a risk. And then there are times like now - fear, confusion, indecision. What if I make the wrong decision? - Ahhh, that old chestnut. This thought comes up at times like this - its nothing new - but just as fear-inducing as every other time.

So I think back (excuse this Mama for thinking out aloud today, I need to get thoughts out and down to make sense of this) to what I did last time I was in this situation. Hmmm, no good there, I'm too confused to remember. I'll make a cup of tea instead...

Yes, that's better. The grey matter is starting to warm up. I can do this.

Step one - be kind to myself. I'm the only one beating myself up about making the 'right' decision so best to let that go and focus on things to help me - a walk in the garden, a deep breath of fresh air, a warm drink, some stretching, music...

Step two - change my thought. THIS is what has helped me before (now I remember). I need to think that it doesn't matter which decision I make, either will be good. This helps to break the deadlock in my thinking and I feel myself viscerally relax...

Step three - do something else. I need to forget about making the decision for a while. I decide that I'll make it tomorrow if it hasn't already become clear to me before then. And I'll be happy with whatever it is, because in the scheme of things either decision is a good one.

Carolyn